logical phalluses

Like this one: A is not B. B is the opposite of C. Therefore A is C.

Let's let Alpine = A. B is Blaupunkt. Blaupunkt is obvs superior to Alpine in every way. Alpine is for chumps. Let's let C = Clarion. Ha ha ha ha ha. Are you telling me that Clarion and Blaupunkt have aught to do with each other? They have naught! To do with each other! They are very naught-y. Now. Does this mean that Alpine = Clarion?

FUCK NO I hear you say. Well I should think not. When we say that there are only two kinds of 80's car stereos (Blaupunkt and everything else), what we are really saying is that what we call "everything else" is a graduated collection of car stereos that are inferior in different ways, and to different degrees, to Blaupunkt.

I will now phoneticize the synth line in Herbie Hancock's "Rockit". Bwaat bwaat battabatta bwaat bwaat battabatta BE BOOP! BE BOOP! DAH DOOP DOOP DOOOOH! BOO DAH DOOP BEE DOOP DOOTDOOTIT.

QED, muthaflippers. Quietly Eat a Diiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiick.